WAXWORK Commentary Track

Cody: 00:01:33

Hello and welcome to Box Office Pulp, your one stop podcast for movies, madness, moxie and tonight, the Wax shenanigans continue. Yes, we are back on our wax. Shit. Finally. I know a thing we've promised for approximately eight years is continuing. We're back with the Wax.

I'm your host, Cody, and joining me today for this bop in a movie are my co host, Mike. Say hello, Mike.

Mike: 00:01:53

You know, since you kind of walk into the exhibit and you're transported somewhere, couldn't you make the argument that there are no axe figures in this film?

Cody: 00:02:02

Mike, don't ruin this for me, okay? Don't start this. Okay, moving on. I'm just going to cut out your parts of the podcast entirely.

Mike: 00:02:10

You don't even edit this.

Cody: 00:02:12

The people at home don't know. I don't do anything. I'm going to tell Mike to cut you out. You're ruining the movie magic. And say hello to my other co host, Jamie.

Jamie: 00:02:24

I have a lot of things to say about this movie, but first and foremost, let me say that as a student of history, my favorite pharaoh was Prince Raul.

Cody: 00:02:35

Important background information to have.

Jamie: 00:02:37

No, no. Famously known to be filled with black sludge.

Cody: 00:02:41

Oh, no. I'm looking at my notes and I think I had a stroke when I was writing the next line because these words don't make any sense.

Out tonight, Wax Only coverage continues with Wax work. I wrote like fucking Charlie Day there for a moment. I don't. I don't know what happened to these notes.

Jamie: 00:02:58

I like when I host show bad.

Cody: 00:03:02

Frankenstein typed out that sentence there. Folks, the important thing is we're watching Waxwork tonight, so find yourself a copy. You can find it online.

There is a boutique release of this and Waxwork 2. Wax in Time. I don't actually know what the subtitle is.

Mike: 00:03:20

Tinder. Lost in Time.

Cody: 00:03:22

Lost in Time.

Mike: 00:03:22

You know, it should be Wax in Time, because that sounds kind of awesome.

Jamie: 00:03:26

I just love.

Mike: 00:03:26

It has a new wave soundtrack.

Jamie: 00:03:28

I just love that Waxwork 2 is the only sequel to actually be subtitled Lost in Time.

Cody: 00:03:34

Anyways, those two movies are together on one Blu Ray collection through the Vestron video release. So if you want to get fancy, you can track that down and watch with us. Otherwise, this has got to be online somewhere.

I don't know where, but somewhere.

Mike: 00:03:47

It's on several. It's. It's on prime, it's on Tubi.

Cody: 00:03:50

It's.

Mike: 00:03:50

It's many places. It's very easy to get.

Cody: 00:03:53

So no excuses, folks at home. Unless you don't feel like watching the movie, then you can just treat us like a normal podcast. But that's on you.

All right, so before we get down to the waxening, let's introduce our official drink for the evening. This one's called the Works. Get. Get it. Because the. The movie's called Wax Work and this is the Works. I didn't have a lot to do this time.

Mike: 00:04:15

A really filling sub.

Cody: 00:04:16

Yes, I really found this one in. Anyways, what you're gonna need is 2 ounces of chili liqueur. You're gonna need 1 ounce of a mango syrup.

You're gonna need 1 ounce of lime juice and then some angostura bitters. So the instructions on this guy, you're going to take the chili liqueur and. And the mango syrup. Shake that together with some ice.

Pour that onto a rocks glass with one large ice cube, then float the. I'm sorry, I've already screwed this up. Your drink is now garbage. Throw that out. Start over. You're gonna wanna shake the chili liqueur with my.

Jamie: 00:04:49

You've made mustard gas. Run.

Cody: 00:04:50

Oh, God. People will die. Shake the chili liqueur with the lime juice. Save the mango syrup. I apologize. Shake those two ingredients together with ice.

Pour that onto an ice cube rocks glass and then float the mango syrup on top. And then add in a couple dashes Angostura bitters. Or you can just mix it all together at the same time. I'm not Your dad.

I also don't know if this is any good. I'm a little nervous about this one because most of the time when using chili liqueur, there's other stuff happening.

This is just kind of like to spice it up, not the main ingredient. So this could just be poison? Well, let's find out.

The top sip was entirely mango syrup, so I have no idea what the bottom of this is going to be like. But if you really like sugar. There you go.

Jamie: 00:05:29

Question. When you say chili liqueur, are you talking about just taking a pack of chili powder and then mixing it in a drink and sterling around with a spoon?

Cody: 00:05:39

You know, you have that option that's always definitely something you can do. I prefer to use ancho rays. I think that one's fairly popular. Like, you can. You can find that around in most halfway decent liquor stores.

So if you want yourself a chili liqueur, you're probably gonna use, like, five times in your life. There you go. One bottle will keep you. I'm a little terrified.

I'm gonna take another sip of this thing, and it's gonna hit the pure chili liqueur, and it's gonna fuck me up. But that would be like a movie.

Jamie: 00:06:04

Every sip is a different experience.

Cody: 00:06:07

Hey. What a good transition. Thank you, Jamie.

Mike: 00:06:10

Can I just say, I really am taken with. Oh, no. People will die.

Jamie: 00:06:18

Like wax work.

Cody: 00:06:23

Yeah. You know what?

Jamie: 00:06:25

Better for a movie. That story began with the director hitting a dude with his car.

Cody: 00:06:30

I don't have an answer. Let's just go ahead into it, I guess.

Mike: 00:06:34

Breathing the silliest, uh. Breathe out the sillies. Breathe in the sillies. Breathe out the sillies. Okay, we ready?

Cody: 00:06:40

Yeah. You want to count us down, Mike?

Mike: 00:06:42

All right. One, two, three.

Cody: 00:06:47

Oh, I didn't hit the play button. Oh, God. Oh, God. Woo.

Jamie: 00:06:50

Vestron, I am still waiting for your boutique release of Chatterbox. God damn it.

Cody: 00:06:56

It's, I think, been over a year since their last release, so I'm starting to lose hope we're going to get any more Vestron, but every time I say that, they randomly pop out another Vestron title.

Jamie: 00:07:06

Every Vestron is top notch. They're underrated.

Cody: 00:07:10

It's a fun line. I mean, it's. It's weird to have chud 2 bug the chud with actual special features. It's just not a thing I ever thought would happen in my life.

I'm not necessarily happy about it, but good for them.

Jamie: 00:07:22

It's so weird that they're the ones who got shivers.

Cody: 00:07:27

Yeah, right? It should be on, like, arrow or something. I don't understand at all.

Jamie: 00:07:32

Like, how. How does Vestron get shivers but Vinegar syndrome gets Tammy in the T. Rex. It feels like it should be the other way around.

Cody: 00:07:42

Look, I'm just happy Tammy the T. Rex got such a fine release. That. That.

Mike: 00:07:46

And it deserves it. So happy. Also, we. We pass. But Dracula medallion. Oh, Dracula trophy.

Cody: 00:07:55

To point out here.

I think this was a fun little opening because you got that jaunty music going and then a man being force face first into the fire before, like, dramatic music.

Mike: 00:08:03

Someone that way that's so different and.

Jamie: 00:08:06

Weird swing music is playing. I feel like Mr. Burns is strangling someone to death.

Cody: 00:08:13

Zach Galligan on the commentary mentions this many times that the director Anthony Hickok basically operates by the rule of cool. It doesn't need to necessarily make sense, but if it looks cool, it's going in the movie, which I appreciate. Like you're fucking making a film.

It doesn't matter where the light comes from. It doesn't matter where the sound comes from. As long as it's cool.

Jamie: 00:08:32

Who does?

Mike: 00:08:33

Movies need to go by wheelchair. Yeah.

Cody: 00:08:37

So let's do some movie facts as we go through these fire credits. Moving on. Now we have the Waxwork title melting.

Mike: 00:08:47

More waxwork movie titles need to melt.

Cody: 00:08:50

That's true. 100% true. Anyways, this film was directed by Anthony Hickox. He did both Waxworks movies. There is a sequel. Spoiler.

He also is probably most famously known for directing Hellraiser 3, Hell on Earth, Warlock, the Armageddon, and another kind of goofy underseen one for Vestron Sundown. The vampire in Retreat. Yeah.

Jamie: 00:09:12

Is that good? I've always wanted to see that.

Cody: 00:09:14

It's okay. You got Bruce Campbell being doofy in it, so that's kind of worth the price of admission. Just for that, I just interrupt real quick.

Jamie: 00:09:24

I just want to say I'm 90% sure this kid got adopted by the family from society. I'm getting very similar vibes from this opening.

Cody: 00:09:37

I do love this joke of them not being able to see each other because the table's so long it's got the giant plant in the middle.

Jamie: 00:09:42

I want to know. I want to know what comic book he's reading at the. At the breakfast table by. Nice.

Cody: 00:09:49

I need the caffeine badly. This movie was also written by the director, so, you know, dual threat. Our cast. We just saw our main hero walk out. That's Zach Galligan. You know him?

Come on. We all know him from the Gremlins movies. It's got to be frustrating as a movie star for basically your first role to be your defining one. Like, no.

s and: 2000

So it's not like he's disappeared from the face of the earth. It's just his first role was so big, it's hard to ignore it.

Jamie: 00:10:36

As irritating as I find this character, I really enjoy seeing him play completely against type here.

Mike: 00:10:42

Yeah.

Jamie: 00:10:43

At no point is he looking at the camera saying, don't you relate to me?

Cody: 00:10:50

Yeah, he just commits to being a rich asshole. Even though he's also our main character. It's a weird blend that they've gone for.

Jamie: 00:10:58

What I like is with the way everyone's dressed in this movie, it feels like you're watching Return of the Living Dead. If the punks never showed up, I.

Cody: 00:11:08

Can see that for sure. Let's get through some of the rest of the cast here. We've got Deborah Foreman as Sarah Brightman.

Deborah actually retired from acting in the 90s and is apparently a photographer now, so that's neat. But she had a long string of horror roles, and it's a little surprising she's not more talked about, I guess, in horror cliques.

She was in Grizzly 2 Revenge. Also in Sundown, the Vampire in Retreat, which was Hickox's first movie. But then in. In more comedy stuff. She was in Real Genius.

She was in Valley Girl.

Jamie: 00:11:46

He's gonna just feels like he's gonna pull out a gigantic lollipop and start licking it while making eye contact.

Cody: 00:11:54

In my wax works. Yes. I'm getting David Warner. I just have one more thing I want to mention also.

Mike: 00:12:00

All these. These girls being horny for David Warner dressed like ass.

Cody: 00:12:05

It checks out. Deborah Foreman also, though most famously in my mind was an April Fool's Day. A slasher I absolutely adore.

I think that one does not get the credit it deserves. I love April Fool's Day.

Jamie: 00:12:17

April Fool's Day and Happy Birthday to you are like the two underrated, vaguely holiday theme slashers.

Cody: 00:12:26

If anyone hasn't seen those yet, they do have releases. You should go check them out.

Obviously, April Fool's Day got like the fancy Scream release a couple years ago, so I would encourage you just to go out and Blind. Buy that. Just give it. It's fun. Come on, do it. Don't be a lame. Do it. It's my peer pressure for the evening. Anyways, as long as he's still on screen.

This is David Warner. You know David Warner. He's been in a million movies. You love him. We love him. Let's just run down some of my favorites.

He's evil in Time Bandits, which God damn. One of the best possible villains. Right. How can you one up being the personification of evil?

He has multiple roles in Tron, He's Sark and the Master Control Program. He's in Star Treks 5 and 6. Who could forget Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2?

Jamie: 00:13:16

He was that TGR guy.

Cody: 00:13:18

my favorite roles of his. The: 2001

He got to be in the biggest movie in the world after starring in, you know, vestron titles like 10 minutes too.

Jamie: 00:13:39

It's kind of hilarious.

Cody: 00:13:40

Yeah. And then he gets a little tiny role in Mary Poppins Returns, which I love also.

Jamie: 00:13:45

If you have never seen his face before, but you're our age, you have absolutely heard him as Ra's al Ghul in the Animated Series.

Cody: 00:13:53

Oh, how did I forget? Of course. Yeah. Like the most important villain role.

Jamie: 00:13:57

He's just what race sounds like to me forever.

Mike: 00:14:00

Yeah.

Cody: 00:14:00

100. Yeah. If I hear a voice that's not him, I'm like, eh. That's true of most of the Animated Series villains, though.

Like, when I hear a clayface that's not Ron Perlman, I'm like, what is this?

Mike: 00:14:14

Bane is always just Tom Hardy. Now it's ruined.

Cody: 00:14:17

That's permanent.

Jamie: 00:14:18

Just to pause this commentary for 5 seconds to gas up Andrea Romano. That's called smartly casting movie stars to be voice actors.

Mike: 00:14:30

Yes. Yes.

Cody: 00:14:32

Hey, how timely. It's an accidental Nazi salute. One last casting bit I want to mention, because it cracks me up. John Rhys Davies is in this movie as a werewolf.

Just in case you weren't sure. If you wanted to watch this movie, just. Just have that in the back of your mind. He gets to be a werewolf in this film.

Jamie: 00:14:50

Earlier today, I was watching the old Monster Vision episode on Waxwork, and Joe Bob Briggs referred to the niche John Rhys Davies filled after Indiana Jones as being America's action Pavarotti. And that is. That's just what he is to me. From now on, that's all I will think about anytime I'M watching Lord of the Rings. Action. Pavarotti.

Cody: 00:15:14

Fantastic. Jamie, back to your point about this feeling like a Return of the Living Dead thing without the. The punks.

This very much just reminds me of all of the punks just sitting around the car not sure what they should do with their day. It's got that same vibe going on.

Mike: 00:15:30

It's pretty. Which is so interesting. Like I kind. I. That's one thing I've always loved about wax work is it's the.

It's the 80s horror movie that uses the characters who are usually just in the first act that annoy the main characters. Except this time we follow them around and they're. They have different types of conversations for once.

Jamie: 00:15:51

And while constantly wearing sunglasses. I love that it's just the sunglass brigade. This entire first act.

Cody: 00:15:58

Now some gratuitous slow mo. Football shots and like gets.

Mike: 00:16:04

It allows the movie to also in like Mark's character where he is a preppy douchebag and a rich boy, but there's like little actually the genius of having Gallagher play him. Because you kind of can't hate Zach Gallagher.

Cody: 00:16:21

Yeah. He really softens up that character just by the innate ability of being him.

Mike: 00:16:26

And it actually allows for a character arc to like take place. And you actually get to see different shades of a character where.

Cody: 00:16:34

I love this beer neon sign in the background.

Mike: 00:16:35

I'm sorry, it's signs here. I love this room they're in. I've always been obsessed with this room that seems to be the hangout room that I don't think is in anybody's house.

I think it's like a room that exists out somewhere. You go to. To drink.

Cody: 00:16:51

This is the rich person version of the basement from that 70s show.

Jamie: 00:16:58

We should also do the circle, but they're all just drinking crystal.

Cody: 00:17:02

Oh, now we're talking. I. I keep saying. Okay, I'm not gonna drone on about the cast, but we do have to mention that Dana Ashbrook is in this for a short amount of time.

Jamie: 00:17:12

His first role, I believe.

Cody: 00:17:13

I think you're correct. Yeah.

Jamie: 00:17:15

Which out of the can already. Bobby Briggs. Perfect.

I honestly convinced that a lot of the stuff they did with Bobby in season two of Twin Peaks that doesn't make a whole lot of character sense. Is just one of the people on the crew saw this movie. It's like Ashbrook looks really good in a suit.

Cody: 00:17:36

Wait a minute. All right, moving on. Our cinematography is by Jerry Lively. Lively was the DP for several low budget horror sequels including Hellraiser 3.

Hellraiser Bloodline, Return of the Living Dead 3. Hey, back to Return of the Living Dead and Children of the Corn three. Plus he also directed. I know you guys are gonna be excited about this.

The straight to video Dungeons and Dragons movies, they do exist. We have a physical, tangible link to them. Now.

Jamie: 00:18:13

Are you sure you're not just thinking of the Dungeon Siege direct to video movies?

Cody: 00:18:17

Oh, no, no. I wouldn't lie to my audience like that.

Mike: 00:18:20

How about Dragonheart?

Jamie: 00:18:24

They were still making those as of like five years ago, I think. Dragon hearts.

Cody: 00:18:30

Some of those things just would never die. Anyways, our music is by Roger Bellen. He also did the Unholy. And this was exciting for me. Highlander, the series.

,: 1988

The budget was three and a half million dollars, which they spent every single penny of and then couldn't quite make the ending. They wanted to more on that later, but the box office was pretty low. They made about $800,000.

However, since this is a Vestron title, their whole deal was selling rentals. Right? So I'm without any facts to back me up. Pretty sure this movie did very well on vhs. They did get a sequel several years later.

So it was, it was good enough for that and they kept the same creative team around. So Vestron couldn't have been too upset about the return.

Jamie: 00:19:25

Honestly, looking at the critics like, like the gauge on critic reactions, for the most part, people who liked genre like.

Cody: 00:19:35

This movie, that's not surprising.

Jamie: 00:19:38

Wax Work is exactly what you'd expect it to be. Looking at the VHS box art.

And honestly, I don't, I don't mean this as like a dig, but the entire time I was watching this, I could not stop thinking, why isn't this an Empire movie instead of a Vestron? All this feels super Charles Band, but in the, in the the warm and fuzzy 80s Charles band way, not the Full Moon Pictures way.

Cody: 00:20:12

One thing I don't know how to fit. Love that cigarette drop. I. I don't know how to fit this in.

han Wax Work that came out in: 1992

I mean the, the gameplay itself isn't anything that's gonna blow your mind, but there's.

Jamie: 00:20:38

Click.

Cody: 00:20:39

Yeah, there's video screens that are just insanely, graphically violent. For very, very early video games like, you know, slit throats from Jack the Ripper and zombies mauling people, it's immediately too.

Jamie: 00:20:51

That game has no chill.

Cody: 00:20:53

So that's kind of neat. I. I didn't know this thing existed. All of a sudden it's like, oh, here's a like a fucking festering skull.

Jamie: 00:20:58

Enjoy bitchin soundtrack too, which got. I've become a little bit of an Amiga nerd in the past couple of years. Like, the Amiga is fascinating.

It's basically a gaming PC that came out at a time when no one was gaming on a PC, so no one bought it, but lots of games came out for it that people have not really discovered until the past few years. So it's like discovering a lost game. A console that existed alongside the Genesis and the Super Nintendo.

But like their big thing was adventure games.

So there's lots and lots and lots of weird movie tie in point and click adventure games that are by graphic and sound standards, super ahead of their times.

And because it's on a PC, they have like a lot of graphic content you couldn't necessarily have in, in even like a regular mainstream PC game, which would be more like a family oriented machine.

Also, where a lot of 90s animators got their start was animating on the Amiga, because if you couldn't afford afford the extremely expensive games, you would be justifying the price tag by animating on it.

Cody: 00:22:11

This has been Jamie's video game corner. All right, so now we're getting into the meat and potatoes of Waxwork.

And I kind of love this movie because it stands out so much from all the other wax movies that we've been watching for this video series. The normal setup for these, right, is people go to a wax museum. Someone, normally the artist is a murderer and he's hiding the bodies in the wax.

This one goes supernatural. All of these exhibits are supernatural displays and if you enter them, you actually enter them, which gives them so much freedom.

So if you walk into the werewolf display, oh no, you're in a werewolf movie. If you walk into the zombie display, oh no, you're in Night of the Living Dead.

Mike: 00:22:59

I say, I love that Frankenstein design.

Cody: 00:23:01

It's an easy.

Jamie: 00:23:01

I really dig that.

Cody: 00:23:03

It seems very hammer. You could get like that and hammer.

Mike: 00:23:05

Kane Hodder. Kane Hodder played Frankenstein once.

Jamie: 00:23:07

Oh, wow. I'm glad that Kane learned to stand still eventually.

Mike: 00:23:17

So Wilcox couldn't get. Couldn't get Jason, but still technically got Jason.

I do want to see the version of this movie with all the copyrighted Characters he thought he could just put in there right to the back.

Cody: 00:23:34

It looks like we just passed a display on Freaks. But I love this as a concept and you could, you could theoretically, if this had been a hit, it'd be so easy to do a million more of these.

You know, just pop in a different gruesome display or a movie reference and then do your little 10, 15 minute homage to it. So you essentially have an anthology movie without, ah, it's, it's tough to.

Mike: 00:23:59

What is the invisible man doing?

Jamie: 00:24:01

He's force feeding a woman gasoline while still visible. Meaning that might just be a Vern victim. He was in a, a gas pump fire and now he wants revenge.

Cody: 00:24:15

Now we're talking. If he'd just gone into that display.

Jamie: 00:24:20

Yeah, it gets me. It honestly shocks me after seeing this movie to know this hasn't been remade.

Cody: 00:24:29

Because I think it's very tough to like get people on board for the idea of like a wax based horror movie in the modern day.

Jamie: 00:24:35

It's just weird because it just seems like even if you kind of played fast and loose with the actual wax museum aspect of it for what's essentially like an anthology movie with consistent characters, like it seems like that's a very like modular premise.

Like, like you were saying you could just do again and again and again and with like the little, the little bit of cachet you'd have with horror fans with Waxwork being a deep cut. It's weird that that's never, from what I could see was never even like proposed at any point.

Seems like Fetty Alvarez or somebody would pull this out of his ass eventually.

Cody: 00:25:14

Like when we went through the: 2000

Jamie: 00:25:25

2010Ish in a world where Willard was remade.

Mike: 00:25:29

Yeah, you know, I, I think this, this part right here is where you either understand the movie and get on board or you're just left confused. Where someone just starts doing a self monologue vaudeville routine about suddenly being in.

Jamie: 00:25:49

Another dimension in a shiny, shiny wig.

Cody: 00:25:52

I was about to say in the worst wig imaginable. However, all of a sudden the atmosphere of the movie is completely shifted to. It's, it's, you know, full on fog and it's so sudden.

Mike: 00:26:03

Like there's no subtlety to it. Just like. No. Nope. Just suddenly in the woods.

Jamie: 00:26:07

Yeah. I walked away from my screen watching this.

The first time and I had to rewind it to make sure I didn't miss anything because, yeah, the transition is like a fraction of a second.

Mike: 00:26:18

And that's brilliant. Like, why. I don't know why movies don't like around in that way more often. Like, not everything has to be so subtle. It's funnier this way.

Cody: 00:26:30

Well, that's the other thing. It's. Horror comedies are kind of a hard sell. So you've got one, the horror comedy of this two, it's kind of an anthology.

And those have stopped being popular. So maybe that's why no one would want to try and remake this. There's too many things with strikes against them in the current climate for film.

You could do it, like direct to video and people probably eat it up like a trick or treat type deal. But I don't know if it would catch on in a theater. I would like to see them try, though. They should also bring John Rhys Davies back.

He could just play the same role always.

Mike: 00:27:07

This is. I just love this so much. John Rice Davies was a werewolf one time, dressed vaguely like Herbert Lombard.

Jamie: 00:27:16

And in this movie, too. Specifically this movie. Like, the fact that this movie has the cast that it does, used to, the capacity that it uses it is fantastic to me.

Cody: 00:27:30

The comedy works so well for me because you have Davey's just really hamming it up going for this big werewolf performance. And Ashbrook can't take it seriously.

Jamie: 00:27:40

I don't think this was the intended gag at all, but this entire movie feels like the Charlton Heston cameo in Wayne's World 2. Extended to 90 minutes. Hey, legendary actor. Bye, legendary actor.

Mike: 00:28:03

What a performance, by the way.

Cody: 00:28:05

Just like, not acting off of anyone. He's just, like, in a bad wig. He just, like, go for it, man.

Jamie: 00:28:11

I still say this just happened to Bobby. One day this fell into an alternate reality.

Mike: 00:28:21

And then he decides to actually get the wood.

Cody: 00:28:23

Like, I'm committed to the bit. I'll get the wood.

Mike: 00:28:27

Such an amazing Looney Tunes sketch that's taking place. This is where Hundreds of Beavers came from. I'm convinced of it.

Cody: 00:28:35

No, I get it, Dick. This sucks, man.

Mike: 00:28:42

Imagine walking back into a cabin and then the guy you were talking to is suddenly a werewolf.

Cody: 00:28:48

I hate it when it happens, to be honest.

Jamie: 00:28:52

Oh, no. They saved on an effect shot. I love that werewolf just sliding back.

Cody: 00:28:59

This makes me so sad because we don't make movies that have this Evil Dead cabin vibe anymore. We could we just have chosen not.

Mike: 00:29:05

To for some reason bring back cabin.

Cody: 00:29:08

Horror before, you know we saw the kind of funny werewolf slide in front of the camera. I like the kind of zoomed in, gliding camera. Like, we're getting it again right now. And that, to me, is quintessential Evil Dead.

Like, put the camera on a board and just push it around. Use that as the POV of the monster. Oh, hello.

Jamie: 00:29:31

Rabbit ears aside, a surprisingly effective werewolf design.

Mike: 00:29:37

I really like this werewolf.

Cody: 00:29:38

Yeah, I think the ears are kind of off for me, to be honest.

Mike: 00:29:41

They're off, but I like how they move.

Jamie: 00:29:43

So, yeah, I think that's why they're huge. They just really wanted you to notice that they could make the ears move and they overshot it a little bit.

Mike: 00:29:51

It makes it seem a little bit more alive. I love that. I, I They're howling werewolves, and I get very howling.

Jamie: 00:29:57

Yeah.

Cody: 00:29:58

If it weren't for the ears, I'd be much, much more into the werewolf design. I'll say that. That's, like, the one thing that distracts me.

Mike: 00:30:04

I do love the big old white teeth.

Cody: 00:30:06

Yeah.

Mike: 00:30:06

Yes. You know, that's smart.

Jamie: 00:30:09

I mean, in a world where it's surprisingly difficult to find actually good werewolves in werewolf movies, I think this is an outlier also.

Cody: 00:30:19

Come on. How can you beat a werewolf brushing off his shoulder after getting WWE smacked.

Mike: 00:30:23

By and then tearing a guy in half?

Cody: 00:30:25

I was so confused the first time I saw this because it looks like he's smushing his head and then all of a sudden, it just pops in half. Also, these are the worst werewolf hunters you will ever see in any movie. It's a comedy, so it's fine.

But I just, I love how they are so blase when they walk in, like, damn, we're too late. I suppose I'll load my gun now.

Mike: 00:30:42

Oh, damn. A werewolf.

Jamie: 00:30:48

Can you believe this?

Cody: 00:30:50

Yeah.

I was expecting the beat for him to, like, take up a machete and just start suddenly, like, cutting off parts of this guy being like, oh, no, there were several bites.

Mike: 00:30:58

Bobby Briggs is turning into a werewolf. What a world you gotta shoot.

Jamie: 00:31:04

Michelle, are you the only one who loves me?

Mike: 00:31:08

Then being killed by the hunter from Jumanji.

Cody: 00:31:12

The classic 80s bladder effects, too, like he's transforming, make him look like his face is made of tumors.

Mike: 00:31:18

Bladders, a good werewolf face.

Jamie: 00:31:25

A lot of people get killed mid werewolf transformation.

Cody: 00:31:29

Yeah. And I want to give a shout out to the Foley work on the guns. Specifically in this movie, every gun sounds like it's a bazooka.

They really, they make sure the guns pack a punch. Like, later on when they're in the mummy scene, and they're just firing the revolver. Each one of those bullets looks like it should rip you in half.

They really emphasize how strong every gunshot is in this film.

Jamie: 00:31:51

Also, it's weird to say subtle during waxworks, but I love the subtle joke that it makes. A domestic scene with the werewolf at the dinner table and the sun slumped over. Like there's some kind of dysfunctional family.

Cody: 00:32:11

That scene is in the background. The crib. It lives. I think so.

Mike: 00:32:19

There is.

Cody: 00:32:19

It.

Mike: 00:32:19

There isn't. It lives.

Cody: 00:32:20

Baby.

Mike: 00:32:21

Later.

Cody: 00:32:21

So, yeah, I'm gonna go with that.

Jamie: 00:32:24

Maybe I'm overthinking this a little bit, but is she named China because she becomes a doll?

Cody: 00:32:31

Oh, I could see that.

Jamie: 00:32:33

Otherwise, that's very, very weird.

Mike: 00:32:36

I also assumed it was just a joke about rich people names.

Jamie: 00:32:41

I can see that also.

Mike: 00:32:44

So where is this Dracula rate on the. The sexiness scale and the sexiness scale of Dracula's? Where does Ator the Fighting Eagle as Dracula? Right.

Jamie: 00:32:56

Oh, Mute Tarzan. God. He is very suave. He's definitely one of the more well dressed Draculas. He's very alucard to me in his manner of dress. He's.

Mike: 00:33:09

Yeah, he is.

Cody: 00:33:10

And very direct. Like, he just demands things like, come here, sit down.

Jamie: 00:33:15

This specifically seems like a video game Dracula to me. Also. All I could think during this scene was, did Wes Bentley base his entire being off of this performance?

Cody: 00:33:30

I could see that. Someone get Wes on the line. I need to know.

Mike: 00:33:35

Steak tartar. I just like how this Dracula though. Like, Xena has friends.

Cody: 00:33:45

And although his dinner party seemed very.

Jamie: 00:33:48

Boring, he does have a kid, apparently.

Mike: 00:33:58

I. I just don't understand, like, why does he feel the need to gaslight his victims into Pennywise?

Jamie: 00:34:07

Everyone tastes better when they're scared.

Cody: 00:34:09

That was the first thing I was thinking of. Like, yeah, you can't. You can't let their emotions run out.

Mike: 00:34:12

A Dracula with actual servants too.

Cody: 00:34:15

Oh, they're probably also vampires.

Jamie: 00:34:17

They're actually him running back and forth really fast like the flash.

Cody: 00:34:21

Raw meat. Yeah, that's a classic vampire thing. We don't really need the blood. We just want raw meat. We don't like cooked food. It is. It is funny.

Jamie: 00:34:37

Well, it's funny how rarely you actually see that in movies. Just vampires just eating flesh, which would be filled with blood. So it's a visual you think they'd lean into.

Mike: 00:34:49

It's more of an anime thing, honestly. You see vampires like, take bites out of people more in anime than anything else.

Cody: 00:34:57

I am noticing this guy's doing like the classic I'm very evil acting tip of never breaking eye contact, never lowering his eyes, and he never blinks.

Mike: 00:35:07

And a lot of, a lot of nostril acting. That mustache is fantastic, Perot.

Cody: 00:35:13

I, I, I do, I do feel.

Mike: 00:35:15

Like this scene is also a little bit of a parody of. Because her, like, why is she acting like this? And it feels like to me a parody of rich people.

When meeting other rich people, you can't are just going to fall in line with literally anything and activate and just act a very certain way. And I like how that can go towards cannibalism.

Cody: 00:35:39

This just looks like strawberry jam. It doesn't even look like it looks delicious.

Mike: 00:35:42

I just want to say.

Cody: 00:35:45

Yeah, do it, do it. Come on, do it.

Jamie: 00:35:48

I was gonna say, like, it's weird drawing a line to my life from this scene, but this kind of is how doing any activity with preppy people seems to go, in my experience. Oh, you're not doing the thing we're all doing. That's clearly something you don't want to do. Oh, well, isn't that very funny? Laugh, everybody.

Mike: 00:36:13

Etiquette, like rich etiquette is, is very cult like.

Cody: 00:36:22

Are you guys dealing with a lot of preppy people in your life? I feel like I don't have that many.

Mike: 00:36:26

I watch them from afar.

Cody: 00:36:28

They're in a zoo.

Jamie: 00:36:30

Oh, fucking.

The area of Alabama I live in is very weird because it's in the middle of nowhere, which means the only people who live here are very poor, are really rich, and they want to be in the middle of nowhere.

I once had a lady at my job in very, in a very fine gown come up to me and tell me that in exactly 15 minutes she will be here to purchase a television. And it will be exactly this make and model and cost exactly this much.

And if I am not there with the television on a cart in exactly 15 minutes, I will lose every cent of my Juicy commission. I had to tell her this was Walmart.

Cody: 00:37:15

This woman was plotting, you know, like a heist.

Jamie: 00:37:19

Every bit of that sounded like because it was on a Sunday, it felt like my stupid husband is watching a football game. And I'm the one who drew the short straw of going to the store and getting a replacement TV.

Cody: 00:37:34

To point out some of the set dressing here. In that last scene, I loved how it didn't necessarily make sense that the open door behind them apparently goes to the outside.

So you just have like, foggy moonlight streaming in. But again, it's the rule of cool. It makes for a much more Atmospheric room if you can have some backlighting.

So it doesn't matter if it doesn't make a lick of sense the way this place is designed. And that hallway shot we had a moment ago too. Very fun. I really, I really like. For a cheap movie, it's surprising how good a lot of it looks.

Mike: 00:38:07

I don't think people especially these days appreciate sparse like sets and locations that are usually done for the cheap actually can look really good and have a lot of atmosphere and be very effective. Like just throw like that hallway. Just some sheets billowing.

Cody: 00:38:28

It's also this room.

Mike: 00:38:29

There's nothing in here, but it's. It has so much personality despite having nothing in it.

Cody: 00:38:35

Well, the placement of the camera too. You get all the depth with the, the bed banisters and stuff to kind of break up the scene.

Jamie: 00:38:42

I do wonder how much of a role just subtle movement plays and stuff like that. Like you're saying with like just the billowing drapes.

It's like of my lifelong obsession with the low budget movie fan in the wall that you can shine a light through which immediately decorates your set with nothing. It's like all you. It's like a squiggle vision animation.

Like you can make a still image look engaging with just a tiny little bit of barely noticeable movement.

Cody: 00:39:14

Plus these, these last two kind of monster scenes are so atmospheric because they realize the secret. Just pump in a shit ton of fog and some lights. It makes it look so cool.

Granted, I think I heard something about like a lot of the Hollywood fog from back in the day having to be basically rescinded because he was giving people cancer. So maybe that's why we're not getting so much fog anymore.

Jamie: 00:39:37

Oh, this is what killed John Wayne.

Cody: 00:39:40

No, no, no, that was the radioactive dust.

Mike: 00:39:42

Yes.

Jamie: 00:39:43

That was portraying a racist role.

Cody: 00:39:46

Yeah.

Mike: 00:39:48

I love this room so much. Also, can we just give it up for this actor playing Charles? The greatest performance in cinema history.

Cody: 00:40:03

Much like the plot of the movie. I love that she enters in a new room and all of a sudden we have a completely different environment. And now it's pure white thing.

Jamie: 00:40:13

I like how a rat found its way in there in their clean room.

Honestly, walking into any room like this in a wealthy person's house is going to be terrifying regardless of context because whatever goes on in there is a kink.

Mike: 00:40:38

So do you think they wanted the, the, the butcher room to be all white because it would be easy to clean up because they would know where all the spots were.

Cody: 00:40:46

I wouldn't be surprised. But it makes such a fun contrast to what we've seen before. You know, the very baroque room.

And now it's something surprising, a little more modern looking and clinical. We don't get vampires in this scenario as much, so this is fun to me.

Mike: 00:41:02

This room is also. It's wrestling logic, where you know there's going to be blood splatter everywhere.

And in, like wrestling, if someone is wearing a white outfit, you know they're gonna bleed.

Cody: 00:41:13

It's guaranteed.

Jamie: 00:41:15

Also, I don't know about you, but I can't take this actor seriously at all because all I can see is Angelus.

Mike: 00:41:24

Yeah, yeah. If only he also got turned into a puppet.

Cody: 00:41:35

The vampire becomes less threatening when he has to, like, kind of lunge across the body and he can't quite grab for something.

Mike: 00:41:40

He appears to be stuck as well.

Jamie: 00:41:41

Okay.

Cody: 00:41:41

Yeah, they.

Jamie: 00:41:43

They totally came up with the joke of him jumping onto the foot the day of. Right?

Cody: 00:41:48

It's gotta be like, this is too good an opportunity not to do. Put him in a white frilly pirate shirt, have him jump on the leg.

Jamie: 00:41:54

Like nobody writes while constructing an action scene. And then he falls onto the dude's leg and he goes, ah, no, stop. While he fumbles around with the.

With the separate leg on his torso, like a turtle on his shell.

Cody: 00:42:18

Slight missed opportunity to not show the bloody shirt before he gets the knife stuck in him. To really exaggerate how silly it is that he jumped on a, you know, severed leg. Essential.

Mike: 00:42:34

I like how Charles is a vampire expert.

Cody: 00:42:37

He's been here long enough, he knows what's going on.

Jamie: 00:42:39

That's why they came there, so he could assassinate them. He just did a really bad job.

Cody: 00:42:45

Oh, more bladders.

Jamie: 00:42:48

Feel like that's what would happen if I was ever assigned with taking down Hannibal Lecter. I would just be really taken in by the cuisine and the company. And before you know it, I'm on the table.

Cody: 00:43:00

No, no, no. If we're here too light. If you're polite, Hannibal's not gonna serve you for dinner. You gotta be a jerk first.

Jamie: 00:43:08

Also. So this wine bottle gag is the best thing in this movie, right?

Cody: 00:43:12

Oh, it's fantastic. It's a very good gag. Classic Dracula Brides.

Mike: 00:43:22

So ridiculous.

Jamie: 00:43:24

I am very frustrated because my version of this that I watched was on tubi, which is. Is the pan and scan version randomly enough, which is also has the cuts. So that scene was just like 2 seconds long. I had to look at.

Look it up online to get the. The full effect. Gag does not work when you cut the Middle out?

Cody: 00:43:47

No. Oh, that's such a bummer. Because it's such a funny idea.

Jamie: 00:43:50

You know, you get the bottles through her chest, but it immediately cuts away the second the water.

Cody: 00:43:56

So you don't get the champagne foam.

Jamie: 00:43:58

Yeah. So it's such. So blank and you miss it. You don't even realize the shot happened until you think about it a minute later.

Cody: 00:44:05

Lame. Come on, Tubi. What are you doing it?

Jamie: 00:44:08

Well, it's weird. The edited version of this movie, it's just like. I think there's like 10 seconds cut out of it.

And it's just extra gore shots, but nothing terribly explicit, just effects going on a little longer.

Cody: 00:44:24

Well, the movie's fairly bloody, but I think they could get away with it because it's also very funny.

Mike: 00:44:30

It's super cartoony.

Cody: 00:44:31

Yeah. If you're funny in a cartoon, I don't think the MPAA comes down nearly as hard in you.

Granted, some of the latter Friday the 13th were also trying to be funny and they still had to do quite a bit of editing. So maybe I'm talking up my ass.

Mike: 00:44:46

They also had nudity and the MPAA hated them.

Cody: 00:44:51

Yeah, they. They always did have to deal with their reputation.

Jamie: 00:44:53

That's the big thing with. At the MPAA of that time was specifically mixing sex with violence. You can have sex and maybe you'll get an R rating.

You can have violence and get an R rating, but put the two together.

Mike: 00:45:07

You'Re an ex town vanilla.

Jamie: 00:45:12

Which is weird because it's one of those things where it's like. It's like hearing Frederick Wertham talk back in the day. It's like you be.

You start at the nugget of a valid way of thinking and then you immediately veer off into weird reactionary territory. It's like, okay, okay, maybe think we should think a little bit about how we mix sex and violence in our entertainment.

Abolishing it completely is not the answer.

Cody: 00:45:44

Why are we talking about. That solves all the problems immediately. See, I like how we started with actual movie monsters. You know, we've got the classic werewolf, the vampire.

What else? Sadist. What?

Mike: 00:45:58

Markey de Sad. And this chick's into it. She needs an awakening. God, we.

Jamie: 00:46:04

I feel like we could. We could write an entire book on kink shaming in specifically 80s horror. I. I love that it is.

It's common enough to be a trope that, you know, in a horror movie, specifically a slasher movie, if you are into S M, you are better off dead.

Cody: 00:46:31

Well, they're talking on the Commentary too, that some of the lines they wrote for the marquee. They really thought we're gonna get scrubbed. They thought the NPAA was gonna like, hit him and tell him like, you can't do that.

Or the producers are gonna be like, no, you gotta change those lines. And no one objected to it. So they're able to just kind of sneak in whatever they wanted. Like, it's really.

Mike: 00:46:47

No one really oversaw them. Just jealous. She had her first orgasm at the end of a whip instead of by your hand, which is how. Honestly, don't.

Don't leave your girlfriend alone with me.

Jamie: 00:47:03

I just. It's so surreal hearing that said in a movie from this era where even in like grown up.

What we're gonna talk about how adults movies, they talk about S M in such skittish high school terms. Hearing somebody. Again, not. Not to armchair psychoanalyze, but the S M scenes in this movie are filmed lovingly.

I will say, like, I do not think somebody was coming in from a outside looking in perspective, which is perfectly fine. But I think that's why, like, why that's so unique. Well, even if there is like a very like, oh, she's into dirty things. What does that mean?

Kind of implication, like, it's still. I feel like kink is treated with more respect and dignity than any than it you normally would be in a movie of this era.

Which again, weird for wax work.

Cody: 00:48:02

I mean, Hickox did make two Hellraiser films. So it feels in line and you.

Mike: 00:48:08

Know, it's very unique that there's a heroine of the movie who's into it and isn't punished for it and doesn't die.

Cody: 00:48:18

Yeah, like that's.

Jamie: 00:48:19

Or organics have some. Have a. Or have Bubba Brown tree come in and explain to her that she is acting like a goddamn junkie. The second they revealed the tall. The.

The tall butler, I immediately overthought this movie and thought they were gonna go for some kind of like multiple aspect thing with Hans. We're like, oh, sometimes Hans is tall when he's doing this, sometimes Hans is short whenever he's doing this. And now there's just two butlers.

Mike: 00:49:01

They just thought, tall, small. That would be funny.

Jamie: 00:49:04

God. I have.

Despite not having seen this movie until recently, I have had so much affection for Hans in my life solely for the reason that in the 90s, the sci fi Channel would use that clip of him opening the door and welcoming you to the waxwork in the ads for every single Halloween movie marathon each year. So after a while it was like Hans was the unofficial mascot of the Sci Fi Channel.

Mike: 00:49:36

Very much. Yeah.

Jamie: 00:49:38

I always think of him with that channel more than I associate him with Waxworm.

Cody: 00:49:43

As long as we're talking about the butlers though, I want to go back to the Waxwork video game for a second because for whatever reason they've decided to make the. The, like the butler servant character in that game, like some sort of seven foot tall version of the. The butler from the Addams family.

Like he's just ripped and very tall.

Jamie: 00:50:01

And it's such a ripped lurch. It's very strange. He's.

Cody: 00:50:05

I don't know why they went that.

Jamie: 00:50:06

Direction out of a tight, tight suit.

Cody: 00:50:09

Yeah. And he hands you. I think it's, it's. It's like an orb. Right. So you can like communicate with your dead father.

Jamie: 00:50:23

Has nothing to do with wax work. I think they were going off four year old memory of seeing this once.

Cody: 00:50:28

It's vaguely the same, right? Because in, in the video game you enter realms like, oh, there's an Egypt land.

And you just kind of enter in the waxwork display and it takes you back in time so you can fight an evil brother.

Jamie: 00:50:41

Yeah. All of the evil wax figures are twin. Are evil twins due to a curse family, I think.

Cody: 00:50:49

Yes. It's your family. From what I remember, you, one of your distant relatives caught a witch stealing a chicken and his punishment cut off her hand.

So she put a blood curse on your entire family's bloodline. So every time twins are born, one of them will become incredibly evil.

So the point of the game is you have to go to like four different lands and kill off evil versions of your great ancestors, including like Jack the Ripper, some sort of evil mummy, a vampire in a graveyard. I don't know what the last one is. And after doing that, then you go back in time and prevent the curse from even happening in the first place.

So as you can tell, not quite the same as Waxwork the movie, but, you know, it hits some of the ideas.

Jamie: 00:51:36

It'll satisfy that itch Waxwork fans had at the time.

Mike: 00:51:41

Can I say, I've always found this very sweet in this movie that he doesn't want her to know she did a bad job.

Jamie: 00:51:50

I'm fascinated by this sequence because doesn't this seem like a joke from a John Hughes movie? Oh, yeah, Pretty much forcing the maid.

Cody: 00:51:58

To write your paper for you and it's garbage.

Jamie: 00:52:00

That just sounds like something Patrick Dempsey would have done.

Mike: 00:52:10

Why the Deutsch angle?

Cody: 00:52:11

I was just wondering.

Mike: 00:52:12

That throws me Off.

Cody: 00:52:14

This is like a normal scene.

And like, they just felt the need to spice it up, I'm assuming, because it's just kind of a conversation piece without anything actually cool going on.

Jamie: 00:52:21

Well, again, every time you're in this kid's house, I just feel like we're in society and something very terrible is about then there used to be more of us.

Mike: 00:52:34

Why do we always go to the middle of the bleachers?

Cody: 00:52:37

It's the best spot.

Mike: 00:52:39

It just seems like a far away to walk. And we're in the sun.

Jamie: 00:52:43

The kids from I saw the TV glow are having a really heavy conversation 20ft to the left. And they don't want to bother them.

Cody: 00:52:49

They're on the other side behind the bleachers.

Mike: 00:52:51

Pennywise is actually underneath them.

Cody: 00:52:54

There's six horror movies happening right now on various sides of these bleachers.

Mike: 00:52:58

Bleachers on the Edge of Forever.

Cody: 00:53:01

I love this extremely belligerent detective who.

Mike: 00:53:05

Is just fucked up on caffeine, by the way.

Cody: 00:53:08

You know how many people go missing.

Jamie: 00:53:10

Every week because he can't have caffeine.

Cody: 00:53:15

And boiled in wax? I don't think he said anything about boiling them in wax.

Mike: 00:53:19

I just said it was a wax work.

Jamie: 00:53:22

Also, real quick, real quick, you cannot. I don't think you can see this in the widescreen version. Just the pan and scan. The girl who goes to the window, like, makes a kissy face at him.

That's what she's stopping for.

Cody: 00:53:35

Ah.

Jamie: 00:53:41

That is stuck in my head when I watched this the other day because, like, that is such a, like, weird little sweet gesture from. It only has to be just the director getting bored and going, hey, what if you did this in the background?

Cody: 00:53:53

That'll make me some busy work. It's a little sad on the commentary track. It's the director and Zach Gallagher together.

And pretty much it feels like most of Galligan's comments on the movie were him fixating on his weight in this film. Because a lot of the reviews gave him about it because he put on a couple of pounds from Gremlins.

Mike: 00:54:16

There was Gilbert Gottfried, maybe.

Cody: 00:54:19

Yeah, yeah. That was the main thing he mentioned.

Especially like in that scene when he's walking up and he's wearing a polo that's tucked in, which isn't exactly flattering. And I believe Gil Godfrey's comment was like, next up, Zach Galligan after 40 cheeseburgers. Oh, so I feel so bad for Galagan. You can tell. Yeah.

Jamie: 00:54:39

He's also objectively quite good looking in this movie, so fuck off, Gilbert. Rip.

Cody: 00:54:46

Although I agree. The polo was probably not like the best choice, I guess.

Yeah, you're trying to show him as preppy and not necessarily the greatest guy in the world, but he does look.

Jamie: 00:54:54

Like he in a polo shirt right now. Not very fun. I would not.

Cody: 00:54:57

I would not wear a suit coat. And that was a much better deal. Like, we made a mistake.

Jamie: 00:55:03

Well, Werner is just so well dressed in this movie. Just, it pulls everything towards him.

Cody: 00:55:10

It's a little bow tie and sweater vest.

Jamie: 00:55:13

I love that. This dude was like, okay, he's hot. He's employing a little person. You gotta be able to arrest him on that.

Mike: 00:55:22

That's the little people have been outlawed for 300 years.

Cody: 00:55:27

Yeah.

Jamie: 00:55:27

He has the fascination with little people that David lynch had. I just want to know their ways and their customs.

Cody: 00:55:35

It's little people, big crime.

Mike: 00:55:41

Could that be the new tlc?

Jamie: 00:55:43

Can that be the new Ed Brubaker Sean Phillips book?

Cody: 00:55:50

That's gotta already exist somewhere. Someone. Someone's done that idea, I'm sure.

Jamie: 00:55:53

Oh, no. Oh, no. There was a. There was an image comic called Big Man Plans that was about a little person with a bat up people.

Mike: 00:56:01

Oh, yeah. Also, I love this mummy holding court.

Jamie: 00:56:08

That's such a great gag too, because anytime he's in the background, you're going, so when does he move? So when does he move? They wouldn't put him in the background if he's not going to move.

Cody: 00:56:20

I like that. David Warren just like gets bored of people not entering the exhibits and he's just pushing them into them. Like, come on, let's get this done.

Jamie: 00:56:27

Oh, my Penny.

Cody: 00:56:31

One thing I think is interesting about this movie compared to all of the other waxwork murders that we've seen, is traditionally, the guy owning the wax work is either a mad scientist who is trying to play God or. Or he is a mad artist who is trying to give himself something that he can't get normally.

So, you know, maybe he's making a family, maybe he's making a lover. This movie David Moore has about zero interest in any of the exhibits as far as I can tell. Like, it's a means to an end.

Like, I'm just going to make an elaborate wax work so I can try and get revenge on various people that I've had a beef with for generations. And then profit also, maybe make some money, who knows?

Jamie: 00:57:13

I mean, honestly, Werner's motivation just boils down to Satan.

Mike: 00:57:18

Yeah, that's all you need.

Cody: 00:57:21

I'm not criticizing it. It's just interesting because it feels so different from every Other wax movement. Yeah, out there.

Mike: 00:57:28

I. I have a hard time. Like, we see where he makes wax figures and shit. I don't see this character making wax figures.

Cody: 00:57:36

I think they only threw that in at the end because it's obligatory. Like, oh, we have to have the.

Jamie: 00:57:40

Same thing every wax movie.

Cody: 00:57:44

Yeah. Like, by law, we gotta do it also.

Jamie: 00:57:47

We passed it a second ago.

But if there's one thing from the 80s and 9 and, like, early 90s, like one pop culture joke that is nearly impossible to explain to young people today, it's. We were really preoccupied with the idea of Nazi war criminals hiding out in America under comedically everyday jobs.

There wasn't a lot of movies that was.

Cody: 00:58:19

That one's rolling back around. That one somehow turned out to be timely.

Jamie: 00:58:22

But those weren't original Nazis.

Cody: 00:58:25

Ah. To go back to the previous location where the detectives in his office. I just want to comment on how resourceful this movie is.

We've already mentioned it, but I love going back to the kind of classic noir setting of, okay, put the camera directly behind the ceiling fan to make what would otherwise be a very boring scene to film. Kind of visually spicy. You know, it's not too exciting, it's not too distracting, but it definitely is like, oh, this breaks up the scene.

This makes it more. Way more interesting than it would have been if it was just a straight up static shot. Now we get kind of a fun precursor of the House of Wax remake.

Obviously, this is a corpse of. Yeah, I mean, the House of Wax one's great because the guy's still alive and you see his eyeball rolling around.

But actually peeling off the wax to reveal the corpse underneath is always a good gag for one of these films.

Jamie: 00:59:21

It's weird. I think it's just because of an innate fear of, like, hollowing out.

Mike: 00:59:27

I have.

Jamie: 00:59:28

But this. This eked me out so much more than the House of Wax scene.

Mike: 00:59:33

It's gnarly.

Jamie: 00:59:36

It's like you've clicked on the wrong YouTube video and you can't click off fast enough.

Cody: 00:59:43

Well, the thing that gets me about it is when he's pulling out the muscle, it doesn't behave like movie gore. It acts more like wax. It feels like this is just an anatomically perfect wax model, which. It's evil magic. It's possible. Oh, no. Ouija board.

Speaking of evil magic.

Mike: 01:00:01

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:00:02

That's the origin of evil.

Cody: 01:00:04

I got into an argument with my parents a couple weeks ago because they asked me if I would use a Ouija board. I'm like, yeah, I don't I don't associate any sort of magical evil to a Ouija board. They're mass produced by like Parker Brothers. It's, it's a toy.

It's.

Jamie: 01:00:18

They have a trademark on them.

Cody: 01:00:20

, we brought them up from the: 1400

Mike: 01:00:30

Want a collection of Ouija boards.

Cody: 01:00:32

I'm just surprised at how many people legitimately view Ouija boards as tools of the paranormal. It's like, guys, I'm pretty sure you could just get a piece of paper and a Sharpie and just do the same thing.

Mike: 01:00:42

I mean, honestly, it just comes down to, are you putting sigils everywhere? Are you lighting candles? Are like. Because at that point the board's not going to do anything.

Cody: 01:00:53

That's just a communication method. It's like the blinking lights in Stranger Things, you know, it's not particularly special. It just does the job because it's available.

Jamie: 01:01:00

What's so funny? Because, like the, the justification for that I've heard my entire life. Yes.

Obviously it's just a Parker board, a Parker Brothers board game, but you give it power by making it important.

Cody: 01:01:19

That could be true of anything. Yeah, I gotta buy a board.

Jamie: 01:01:22

My bong can summon the dead if I want it to. If you're putting that logic to it.

Cody: 01:01:27

Jamie, I believe there's a whole movie series from Charles Band about that. Has anyone actually seen the evil bong movies?

Jamie: 01:01:34

Ooh, I've seen the original. Whenever Elvira did it for one of her returns a few years back, I was. I have.

It's weird saying this about evil bong, but that is one of the most disappointing movie experiences I've ever had.

Cody: 01:01:49

Oh, just because it's such a silly idea.

Jamie: 01:01:52

Bad at all. It's really lame. Bad and the unfunny kind of offensive and very ass pinchy and just a lame, lame, lame movie.

Cody: 01:02:05

This is very disappointing, especially since they made several of them. So even though it was crap, apparently people just latched on to what a funny name it is and kept.

Jamie: 01:02:12

Every now and then I'll throw one of those on and just see Skip around. Because every now and then there's like actors that show up, like Diana Perenzu.

It's like, oh, I'll see them just interact with a puppet for five minutes and yeah, it's like seven movies of.

We have one location and characters walk in and say things and then they walk out and then another group of characters walks in, says things and walk out.

Mike: 01:02:38

And we have the one joke.

Cody: 01:02:40

All right, I want to. I want to jump into mummy talk.

Mike: 01:02:42

Here because Mommy, Mommy.

Cody: 01:02:44

Probably my favorite segment in, in the movie also, the detective just striking a match on the side of the wall. So cool. We don't get people smoking in movies so much anymore. So it's just. It's very weird to be like, oh, wow, look at that cool, dude.

Mike: 01:03:01

I love how this one detective was just obsessed with the mummy for some reason. My kind of guy. It's like, okay, I'll help.

Cody: 01:03:10

Why not? Also fun. Cut back here to using Swan Lake music, which obviously was the little bit of music. The only music we got for Dracula, I believe.

Did they also use it for Frankenstein?

Mike: 01:03:24

It's in the. It's used in the Mummy.

Cody: 01:03:26

Yeah, I know. Universal pulled it out for the opening credits of a lot of their monster movies.

Mike: 01:03:30

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:03:35

As funny as considering the.

Cody: 01:03:39

Oh, God, it's a giant spider.

Mike: 01:03:41

Where'd that spider even get in there?

Cody: 01:03:44

It doesn't make any sense.

Jamie: 01:03:45

But it's all tunnel.

Cody: 01:03:49

That is a good corpse.

Jamie: 01:03:51

Considering how few effective mummies there really are in cinema. It's funny how this really is one of. One of the horror's best mummies by default.

Cody: 01:04:04

Yeah, I mean, there, there have been obviously a lot of low budget kind of mummy movies. There was the Tom Cruise mummy. It's.

Mike: 01:04:10

Good heavens. It's the mummy. Sorry, I just could not let that. I can't let that go. I mean, that's.

Cody: 01:04:16

Look at this wonderful zombie mummy design. This guy looks cool. I love the design of the pyramid, which is well lit.

You can see everything in it, which doesn't make a lot of sense, but who cares? The mummy's like got ooze coming out of its mouth. This is a cool mummy zombie.

Jamie: 01:04:32

Up your mummies, please.

Mike: 01:04:34

Yeah, really super strength.

Jamie: 01:04:39

Well, the only thing that a mommy has going for it as a movie monster is you're a zombie with powers. So lean into that.

Cody: 01:04:48

Yeah. Trying to think if I'm ranking mummies here. I don't know. The Hammer mummy is really good just because, like Christopher Lee is so jacked.

Like, that's an intimidating looking mummy.

Mike: 01:05:03

That is the greatest scene in cinema history. The mummy bursts in through a back door. Peter Cushing pulls up a shotgun and tries to blow the mummy away. That's art right there.

Cody: 01:05:17

That one's a really good mummy. Obviously, I love the original Universal monsters mummy, but we don't get that much time with the mummy in full makeup.

They got Karloffer, you know that opening scene we don't even get to see him do anything, really.

Mike: 01:05:31

The Mummy is a lame movie.

Cody: 01:05:33

I. I like it, but I wish there was more to it.

Mike: 01:05:37

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:05:38

It feels like a.

It's weird saying this about, like a Universal horror classic that stood the test of time for a hundred years, but the Mummy really feels like a first draft.

Cody: 01:05:49

Yeah.

Mike: 01:05:50

It's almost like it's just a Dracula script with some words changed, the arms opening up to accept her as so good. But the money is.

Cody: 01:05:58

The makeup work really saves the movie. And Karloff is fantastic in it. Those two.

Jamie: 01:06:03

Watch that.

Mike: 01:06:04

Yeah. It's a good movie. It's a bad Mummy movie, then.

Cody: 01:06:09

e. The best would be the. The: 1999

Obviously there's a lot of CGI going on there, but that's a good movie. Action Mummy. It's gooey, it's fun. That movie itself is just a very fun movie.

Mike: 01:06:25

The hand of the Mummy's not too bad.

Cody: 01:06:27

Yeah.

Mike: 01:06:29

I had a year where I watched, like, every Mummy movie in a single month.

Cody: 01:06:34

Yeah. All of. All of the sequel Mummy movies that Universal did that were sequels to themselves and not the.

Mike: 01:06:40

Which is what everyone thinks of the Mummy. Yeah, of course. Is all the sequels to the Mummy, because that's when Karras is actually a shambling around corpse.

Cody: 01:06:48

Yeah. Which I don't love any of those Mummy movies, even though those are the ones everyone thinks of.

Even the Mummy remake is mostly going off the Mummy sequels.

Mike: 01:06:59

Yeah. They're fun, but, I mean, they're not really good movies.

Cody: 01:07:03

They're. They're much more B movies than the original Mummy was in my mind.

Like, obviously none of the original Universal monster movies were super prestige and. But they were treated with a little bit more respect than the, you know, the sequel territory. We got into House of Dracula territory.

Mike: 01:07:19

Yeah. The original is so grandiose. And, like, the sequels are fun, but they're better than the Dracula sequels.

Jamie: 01:07:26

Yeah.

Cody: 01:07:27

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:07:28

I just want to say one of my favorite old movie gags. This character you met 20 seconds ago was in a wheelchair the entire time. Did that blow your mind? People in wheelchairs can exist.

Cody: 01:07:43

What? One last thing I want to say about mummies here. The Mummy from Monster Squad, right up there. That is a fantastic mummy.

Doesn't necessarily have a lot to do because it's not a Mummy movie. Oh, it's Eric Trump. But the design, the makeup on the Mummy from the Monster Squad, I really love, like, the kind of exposed, skeletal face.

Jamie: 01:08:05

Yeah. I did not realize I had Seen the Monster Squad as a child until a couple of years ago when I just watched a clip of that mummy.

Like, oh, that's what all mummies are to me. I have a primal memory of mummy dumb. And it's the mummy from Monster Squad, which is why it has always been in my head.

And I never knew where I got this from. That you can kill a mummy by unraveling him.

Cody: 01:08:33

I think that came from, like, a Scooby Doo cartoon.

Mike: 01:08:37

I think I have seen that in cartoons before. Yeah, which makes sense. I mean, wouldn't that be the only thing holding his bones in enchanted rags?

Jamie: 01:08:48

Also, look at Patrick McNee just hamming it up as the man who procured artifacts from the 18 evilest souls.

Mike: 01:09:00

The number of the devil. He's having so much fun.

Cody: 01:09:03

Divide 18 into three. God.

Jamie: 01:09:06

I. I was telling the guys this before we started because I was worried I was gonna forget this bit of information, but the turnaround on this movie was so quickly. What was so quick? That all of the people doing the model work, like making the wax dummies and doing the.

The face molds for the decapitations, were on the opposite side of the earth and in very, very limited communication with the production. So they had to make these before casting was finalized and they knew who was playing the characters.

So all of the figures are sculpts of the sculptors and not the actors, except for Patrick McNee, and they just put in an old VHS of the Avengers and then made a sculpt of his face based on what they were looking at. And that is blood, sweat, and tears.

Cody: 01:10:04

Gentlemen, you gotta do what you gotta do.

Jamie: 01:10:09

That's pulling out a. A 40 of malt liquor, grabbing a. Grabbing a cigar, and saying, we're making movies, boys. Lock the doors.

Cody: 01:10:21

As long as we are discussing the 18 most evil beings, I've got the wiki up, so let's just run through those quick. Obviously, there's the Marquis de Sade will be playing a much larger role when we get back to the wax shaming.

Mike: 01:10:33

By the way, calling him the most evil beings.

Cody: 01:10:35

Evil being.

Jamie: 01:10:36

I would love for them to walk in on the actual Marquis de sod. And it's just a dude riding in a jail cell. Are you here to rescue me, Robespierre?

Cody: 01:10:48

Also, it's. They. Each one has to just get one victim. It's. It's very weird. This has been like, an ongoing con for 100 years, and it's taken this long to get 18.

Anyway, so we. Marque de Sade. There's a werewolf Just a werewolf. That werewolf alone, though, is the most evil one.

Jamie: 01:11:05

That evil, evil zombie, Count Dracula and.

Cody: 01:11:09

Wikipedia does mention his brides and son exist only within the portal and are not among those displayed. So they don't count. The numbers add up. Nerds.

Mike: 01:11:18

Oh, so his son's not canon.

Cody: 01:11:20

Yeah. There's a dog. Three.

Jamie: 01:11:23

Two is in there. I don't know if it's counting the plant or the lady who was inside of it.

Cody: 01:11:28

We'll get to that. There's the Phantom of the Opera, the Mummy, George A. Romero style zombies, which I guess collectively count as one.

Mike: 01:11:36

So the idea of George A. Romero zombies is.

Cody: 01:11:39

Okay, I think. They don't have these numbered, so maybe, like, the zombies make up with the other guys.

Frankenstein's monster, Jack the Ripper, the Invisible Man, a voodoo priest, a witch, a snake man, Rosemary's Baby, an ax murderer, an alien, a giant talking Venus fly trap, and Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. So hold on, let me. Let me count these and see if it actually has updates.

Mike: 01:12:04

I don't. I don't think they should count Dr. Jekyll because he was fine.

Cody: 01:12:08

He runs up.

Jamie: 01:12:09

Yeah, I just. I love that. This and Neon Maniacs are the two ensemble monster movies where one of the monsters is just a dude from Africa.

Cody: 01:12:23

Okay, so if you count zombies as one collective whole, this does add up to 18 individual evil beings.

Mike: 01:12:30

Was the. Was the sideshow freak in there?

Cody: 01:12:34

Uh, the snake man? Maybe that's what they mean by snake man. Hmm.

Mike: 01:12:40

Was the snake man the side? So maybe.

Cody: 01:12:43

Because in Freaks, right there, there's the one guy with no hands who has to, like, light cigarettes using his lips. Only, though I thought there was also.

Mike: 01:12:50

A gill man in here. I thought it was the snake man.

Cody: 01:12:53

You know, this is Wikipedia. They could definitely be wrong.

Mike: 01:12:56

Yeah.

Cody: 01:12:56

Yeah, they do. They do have a source cited, though. The Essential Monster Movie Guide. A Century of Creatures in Film by Forest J. Ackerman. So are you okay?

Mike: 01:13:05

If it's Ackerman, it's. It's solid.

Cody: 01:13:07

Yeah. Like, come on. He wouldn't lie to us.

Mike: 01:13:12

My God, the Adamantium.

Jamie: 01:13:15

What's it? Cools. Unbreakable.

Mike: 01:13:20

I was teeing you up, so I'm glad you knew where I was going.

Jamie: 01:13:23

David Warner looks at a gauge in the bottom of a dam and goes.

Cody: 01:13:27

No.

Mike: 01:13:33

Honestly, if an X Men movie had been made in the 80s, he would have totally have been the scientist behind Weapon X.

Jamie: 01:13:40

That or Magneto. Werner would. God, Warner was born to be 80s Magneto.

Cody: 01:13:46

Wow. Yeah.

Mike: 01:13:47

Oh, my God. He would have worn the The Good Guy Magneto outfits.

Jamie: 01:13:53

The M gown.

Mike: 01:13:54

Yeah, the. The M pajamas.

Cody: 01:13:58

All right. They must have gotten product placement from Zippo because they actually showed the Zippo lighter tank. Okay. Damn you, Eric Trump. Tall Eric Trump.

Jamie: 01:14:09

I am obsessed with Desad. Serving girls who look like they came out of lair of the white worm or something.

Mike: 01:14:18

Right.

Cody: 01:14:19

I do want to mention here the. The guy on the right who is not the Marque de Sade, the English prince. That is the director. That's Anthony Hickox.

Jamie: 01:14:28

Yeah.

Mike: 01:14:28

Seeming very comfortable amongst all this S.

Cody: 01:14:31

And M. Yeah, yeah.

Jamie: 01:14:32

Apparently he was. Like, the fact that he was. Put it like he cast himself in this role was a reference to the outrageous and infamous parties he was known to throw.

Cody: 01:14:44

They do mention that in the commentaries, which.

Jamie: 01:14:47

That has different connotations today.

Cody: 01:14:50

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:14:52

Why is the soda pirate?

Mike: 01:14:54

Hey, they could have been fun sex parties.

Cody: 01:14:56

I assume he just cast himself because, like, they needed a guy with an English accent, and he was English, so.

Mike: 01:15:02

And there's no money.

Jamie: 01:15:03

He looks extraordinarily dandy.

Cody: 01:15:07

But this is stretching the director cameo bit pretty far. Like, he's an actual character. He gets a scene.

Jamie: 01:15:15

He just wanted to get a really good look at what they were doing.

Mike: 01:15:24

I mean, what's impressive is he's actually pretty good.

Cody: 01:15:26

Yeah. No, he's. Yeah. If I didn't know any better, I wouldn't have just popped in there.

I mean, we kind of get a scene a little bit like this in Bloodlines, so.

Mike: 01:15:37

Oh, yeah.

Cody: 01:15:38

I think this is just his thing. He just likes these scenes.

Mike: 01:15:42

That scene really does have this aesthetic. I never thought about that.

Jamie: 01:15:46

It's very weird saying this, considering what a Hellraiser nerd I am. I've never seen Bloodlines, but wax work makes me want to see it even more so than Hell on Earth.

Cody: 01:15:58

I have a soft spot for Bloodlines. A lot of people don't like it, but I'm into it. I think people are bummed out because it could have been something very different.

Jamie: 01:16:09

That's my thing. Why I've never sought it out. I feel like it would bum me out because I know what that movie was supposed to be.

Cody: 01:16:17

But the nice thing is we do have the novelization of the original script out now, if I'm remembering right, I think that's through Encyclopocalypse.

Jamie: 01:16:31

I believe so. Yeah. The dudes that do all the movies.

Cody: 01:16:34

Yeah. So they got, like, Hickoks involved in that, and that's really cool.

If you're a Hellraiser fan, that's definitely worth Checking out It is a bummer we didn't get that version done. Exactly. Because I think it would have been such a cool way to cap off Hellraiser. Just imagine that was the version of Hellraiser we got.

And then there were no direct to video crappy sequels like that Would have been a really cool way to end that series.

Mike: 01:17:05

The release version at least has substance.

Cody: 01:17:08

It works for me. Plus the Arrow version I think has a work print cut that's a little different. Obviously it's not the full thing.

You're not going to get all the stuff you've been missing. Some of it wasn't even filmed, but it's better than nothing. This is a fun little zombie homage.

Mike: 01:17:25

These are solid zombies and there's some like, Italian zombie. Yeah, like the one we just saw.

Cody: 01:17:30

Like very fulcy zombie teeth.

Jamie: 01:17:31

It blew my mind when I found out they filmed this in like a couple of hours. This looks like something they slaved over for a week.

Cody: 01:17:41

But they get like a really cool mashup of aesthetics of George Romero and Italian zombies. Like you're saying stupid hand gag. Back to Evil Dead 2.

Mike: 01:17:51

So good that hand's gonna be the villain of the sequel.

Jamie: 01:17:56

They thought the hand was the breakout character of this movie. This is our kid.

Cody: 01:18:01

I love black and white filmmaking tricks. The the one they mentioned on the commentary was that Gallagher's hair was dyed like ugly bleach blonde so it'd show up correctly.

Jamie: 01:18:12

I'm convinced the weird Doctor who outfit that David Warner was wearing at the beginning of the movie was meant to be shot in black and white.

Cody: 01:18:22

I could see that that would make a lot more sense because, yeah, that hair would have looked stupid as hell in real life in color. But in this segment, it's perfect. It's kind of like finding out that the blood in the shower scene in Psycho is just know Hershey's syrup.

Mike: 01:18:38

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:18:40

Quickly, run.

Mike: 01:18:41

Run from the tall man.

Cody: 01:18:45

And the classic. We're going to make him look longer and taller than he is by giving him jacket sleeves that are way too goddamn short.

Mike: 01:18:53

I'm surprised that wasn't Doug Jones.

Cody: 01:19:01

What a one liner.

Jamie: 01:19:03

I love how much bar fighting there is in this movie across time.

Cody: 01:19:09

Yep. Well, they said that was essentially what they had to do for the ending.

The original plan was they were going to literally jump through time in different eras and zones, but because Hickok saved that for the end of the movie, they had blown their budget and the Bondholder told them, hey, you have one day to finish your movie. I'm not giving you any further cash.

So they had four days scheduled to do this big, huge finale, and they had to pare it down to essentially a series of fistfights.

Jamie: 01:19:38

Better, I say.

Mike: 01:19:40

But honestly, I love the ending of this movie. It is so fucking bonkers and out there. It goes so far and awesome.

Jamie: 01:19:49

A legion of good guys who are all octogenarians get into a pub fight with movie monsters from across time.

Mike: 01:19:59

Jenkins appears to be the greatest character ever. He needs to team up with the dude from House two.

Cody: 01:20:09

That was.

Jamie: 01:20:10

That was.

I'm so glad I went into this movie almost entirely blind, because the moment he picks up that phone, I said out loud, oh, is he calling together the Adventure Society to fight the monsters? Fifteen minutes later, the Adventure Society has re. Has been resumed to fight monsters from across time.

Cody: 01:20:32

One thing I want to point out here.

Anthony Hickox is the son of Douglas Hickox, who, you know, made a lot of Films throughout the 60s, 70s, 80s, including drum roll, Theater of Blood, which I thought that would get a bigger response here. Apparently you guys don't really care for that one as much, but come on.

Mike: 01:20:52

I love Theater of Blood. I just. I. I thought I was. I thought there was more coming after that. No, it's awesome that he did Theater of Blood. Yeah.

Jamie: 01:20:59

I was just gonna say, I know really confrontationally.

Cody: 01:21:04

He did other stuff too, but that was, like, the most impressive one in my mind. He did Zulu Dawn. You know, Branigan.

Jamie: 01:21:09

His mother hasn't has several Oscars for editing. Like, he comes from a prestigious Hollywood family. And let me tell you, if.

Cody: 01:21:18

More.

Jamie: 01:21:20

We would not be having nepotism discourse if more children of Hollywood families did schlocky B movies. No, this is what you should use your cachet for.

Mike: 01:21:33

I love how that's. That's what, like, I'm gonna be a rock star, and then I'm going to write Waxworks and then direct Hellraisers.

Jamie: 01:21:41

It's just very amusing to me that of all. Like, if you told me, oh, this is. This is Jimmy the. Like, this is Jimmy Carpenter. Like, this is what he. He turned out to make.

Oh, this is Roger Corman's son.

Of course he made Wax Work, the dude who directed Theater of Blood and the cinematographer or the editor of Lawrence of Arabia that I did not see coming, honestly, makes this movie more charming, because whether or not that was on Hillcox's mind or not, it's very much feels like a nod to his father's work in a way.

Mike: 01:22:20

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:22:21

Especially with how much hammer love there is. In this and how much old Hollywood love there is. I was like, God, this dude's not Jason. Isaac's performance makes me sad.

Cody: 01:22:30

Yeah, yeah, I sing it the whole time. I just wanted to bring up the family connection, though, because they.

Hickox mentioned he was talking to his dad about this and his dad told me advice like, hey, you always have to film the ending first because that's the most expensive thing you have.

So if you ever run out of money, at least like, you can skimp on the beginning of the movie, the middle of the movie, but you don't want, like to cut out your ending. So unfortunately, a lesson you learned too late. One other thing I wanted to mention here that blew my mind.

I didn't even realize there was a Prince Valiant movie. But Hickox made that as well, apparently.

Jamie: 01:23:08

I didn't know it happened or that I was knew it happened. I didn't know it was directed by anyone I'd heard of.

Cody: 01:23:14

The film was described by one of its actors, Warwick Davis, as a disaster from start to finish, which was premiered, panned, and bombed. Warwick blamed this on Hickox, who he said seemed intent on partying all night long and giving roles to his friends.

Mike: 01:23:31

That just sounds like a good time, though. What are you to do with Prince Valiance?

Jamie: 01:23:37

Yeah, I know, I'm just imagining it's that fucking canon Mata Hari movie where she's topless the entire time, but it's. It's just this dude with no pants.

Mike: 01:23:51

The power of Zach Gallagher.

Jamie: 01:23:54

I'm gonna be honest. I'm. I'm on team Leave her to the perverts. Like, come on, she's having a good time, dude.

Mike: 01:24:01

Yeah, right. Don't, don't, don't, don't take her back to your vanilla hell.

Cody: 01:24:05

She seemed like she was having an okay time here, except for the fact you were gonna murder her, but come.

Mike: 01:24:09

On, let's go have missionary over and over and over again through a sheet.

Cody: 01:24:15

What is he? Homage?

Jamie: 01:24:17

Magic underwear. Okay. Potentially a hot take in today's far more regressive climate.

But I am of the opinion that as long as they are not like, tricking actors into doing things they themselves don't realize are sexual at the time. More directors should put their fetishes in movies.

Mike: 01:24:43

It's interesting 100%.

Cody: 01:24:45

I saw people talking about David lynch just being a full on horn dog, but how it was okay when he did it because he was very open about it while not actually trespassing on people like they knew what was going on. David lynch is Just gonna be like, oh, wooga. Wow. The most beautiful lady I've ever seen.

Jamie: 01:25:03

I found out listening to. To. You must remember this. When Karina Longworth was talking about sex and movies in the 80s and 90s, that's how Adrian Line directs sex scenes.

Cody: 01:25:21

Like David Lynch. Yeah.

Jamie: 01:25:23

According to his actresses, Line is not sensitive enough to like, like intellectually make the cast very comfortable on set during a sex scene. But he still is a consummate professional, so he wants the environment to be good.

So while doing like, like Fatal Attraction and An Indecent Proposal, during the sex, he would stand off to the side going, ooh, baby, yeah. You are making my dick stiff. And they said thing they've ever.

They had ever heard and it actually worked because it was impossible to take it seriously because the act. The director was being such a clown about it. It's like, we got it. And the.

I think it was like blanking on the actress's name, but she was like, yeah, you'd think that would be really off putting, but in context, that was like the sweetest thing I'd ever seen. It was very dad. Like, like adorable. I don't actually know how to talk to women and make them feel comfortable.

So I'll just make a clown out of myself. So everyone's laughing.

Cody: 01:26:38

I'm sorry.

Jamie: 01:26:38

I want to go before intimacy coordinators.

Cody: 01:26:41

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:26:42

Directors had to make Tex Avery wolf noises, but now they can't because of wokeness.

Cody: 01:26:50

I want to go back to Prince Valiant, the movie for a second because I looked up the cast listing for it and Jesus Christ. Katherine Heigl was. Was in this. She was like one of the main characters. Thomas Kretschman was in here. Udo Kier. We've got Ron Perlman. Warwick Davis.

Jamie: 01:27:06

The: 1997

Cody: 01:27:09

Yeah. Anthony Hickox cast himself as Sir Gawain.

Jamie: 01:27:13

Oh my God. Stephen. Stephen Moyer as Prince of Valiant is. I can't tell if that's stupid casting or amazing casting.

Cody: 01:27:23

Isn't Prince Valiant supposed to be blonde on the poster? He's got dark hair.

Jamie: 01:27:27

The important thing though is Ron Perlman from True Blood.

Cody: 01:27:32

Ron Perlman made the top listing of the poster. That's the important part. That's all I care about anyways. Oh God. It's all the monsters. I like that the main heroes in this weren't even important.

They just got two other people to die. And like, there we go. There's our 18. We didn't actually need like the. The great descendant to come in and die in this place. It's fine.

Mike: 01:27:55

Thankfully, there is a lot of teens in this town that want to go to a waxworks.

Cody: 01:28:00

David sells that line, but it's so stupid.

Jamie: 01:28:04

Run.

Cody: 01:28:04

Run. There's nowhere to run. Oh, there's a snake, man.

Jamie: 01:28:07

What must have been on his mind when saying that? Because I feel like it was.

What was going through the actor who played Mark's head in the room when he said, keep your stupid comments in your pocket. I feel like David Warner had a dark night of the soul saying, run, run. There's nowhere to run.

Mike: 01:28:30

He filmed his entire role in two days.

Cody: 01:28:32

I'm so confused. If evil gets out, it will contaminate the world. What does that mean? If.

If Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde are seen at a pub, like, all of a sudden the world gets eviler. What happened? Why don't I.

Jamie: 01:28:44

Don't they seem to be terrified that these 18 wax figures will destroy the world? Also, I love that the brain alien dude was real at some point.

Mike: 01:28:58

This is so delightful.

Cody: 01:29:00

His battle wheelchair with crappy camouflage.

Jamie: 01:29:06

And they beat the out of the invisible man.

Mike: 01:29:10

Hey, I'm just a guy invisible.

Cody: 01:29:12

I'm not invisible. Let me take my victim.

Mike: 01:29:16

I was a Nam.

Cody: 01:29:18

I was a n. What I love.

Jamie: 01:29:21

Is this movie's screenplay was written in three days that is completely unrelated to this ending. Existing.

Cody: 01:29:29

Wha. Wha. Why? Why did they all bring knives and bats? Why didn't they bring guns?

Jamie: 01:29:35

Because they're old.

Mike: 01:29:37

The recoil will kill them.

Cody: 01:29:39

Stab him. You've seen that. Help me.

Jamie: 01:29:46

Did we go into the reason this movie exists?

Mike: 01:29:50

No, I think we just hinted at it. I don't think we said it directly.

Cody: 01:29:53

Yeah. If you want to give him the full works, which is just it, the full wax works. Yeah. Thank you.

Jamie: 01:30:01

But I love. It's so stupidly simple. It sounds like someone telling a fake story to cover up, like, a crime or something.

But Hillcox hit it, hit another car just driving around la.

And while he and the driver were exchanging insurance information and waiting for things to get sorted out, the guy goes, hey, I'm a producer and I really need to get a movie made soon. And you said, you're a director. You want to direct a movie for me? And three days later, he had a screenplay.

A screenplay which they shopped around to, like, every horror studio at Hollywood. And shockingly, all of them said, go. No, go to hell.

Mike: 01:30:46

Including Vestron.

Jamie: 01:30:48

Which they then had to sneak the script past all of the people between Hillcox and the CEO of Vestran and personally deliver it to him. And he Fucking loved it. Which implies that there was a barrier constructed around the head of Vestron to prevent this movie from happening.

Cody: 01:31:12

I just.

Mike: 01:31:13

Look, we know what Vestron releases are like. Let me just ask you a question. What was the line for the people who did quality control?

Jamie: 01:31:25

I would like to reiterate for the second time in this commentary, Vestron released Chatterbox.

Cody: 01:31:33

Kiss. This Hickox must have had just maxed out charisma stats, because even. Even Gallagher, like, he admitted, I didn't want to do the movie.

Like, I. I had no interest in it. Like, I'd read the script. I'm like, this is not for me. But he went to a lunch with Hickox anyways, and Hickox just charmed him so much.

He's like, well, all right, I'm in the film.

Mike: 01:31:58

He seems like a nice guy to hang out with.

Jamie: 01:32:01

Or he just. Behind you. He just poured rock and roll cocaine onto the table.

Cody: 01:32:06

Yeah.

Mike: 01:32:07

Oh, he just has it in his veins at all times. So he just opens up his wrist like a vampire and just pours out.

Cody: 01:32:14

Jenkins.

Mike: 01:32:15

No.

Cody: 01:32:16

Poor, sweet Jenkins.

Mike: 01:32:18

The heroic death of Jenkins.

Cody: 01:32:25

Hey, I'm also dying over here. Is anyone gonna pay attention to me?

Mike: 01:32:28

Beautifully ridiculous.

Cody: 01:32:33

Stab that zombie by grab thaws hammer by the sons of Orvan, you shall be avenged.

Jamie: 01:32:46

Wait, I just note. He was lighting that dude on fire. He poured gasoline on him.

Cody: 01:32:50

Holy Christ. Shoot that baby.

Mike: 01:32:55

Yes.

Cody: 01:32:55

Oh, there we go. Yep. Oh, this baby does not.

Mike: 01:32:59

Glorious moment.

Cody: 01:33:01

Wasn't the same gag used in fucking Fright Night. At the start, anytime you just grab a bat and shoot it in the face, it's just such a funny idea, this blowing Dracula. Eat lead, you son of a bitch.

Jamie: 01:33:21

I'm so impressed.

Mike: 01:33:22

He wasn't a monster.

Jamie: 01:33:23

He was just small.

Cody: 01:33:25

She doesn't even throw him. She gently pushes him in and just wipes her hands.

Jamie: 01:33:30

That's a hate crime. Yes, you did kill your friend. I like to think, because of Jenkins involvement, that the implication is that all of these men were former butlers.

Cody: 01:33:48

Yeah, it's a butler society.

Jamie: 01:33:50

This is the Council of Pennyworths. Why is the Marquis de Sade a pirate?

Cody: 01:33:57

I like that they settled. No one knows. I like that they settled on him being the most evil of all of them, though.

Jamie: 01:34:03

He's the main movie.

Cody: 01:34:05

Yeah.

Jamie: 01:34:07

What. What I appreciate about that is, you know, the actual Marquis de Sad would love that.

So, yes, I was very thin and very rakish, and I was a swashbuckler, and I had many, many fancy parties at that big mansion. I totally had. Yep.

Cody: 01:34:26

I was also the best at swords.

Jamie: 01:34:29

I. I wasn't just a writer.

Cody: 01:34:38

Sneak. Sneaking in, sneaking in. I love how important. No, peripheral vision.

Jamie: 01:34:45

Like, you know, I love how important it is to any movie with heavy sword fighting that nobody has peripheral vision.

Cody: 01:34:56

It's a little sad, though. We don't get David Warner doing the sword fighting here.

Mike: 01:35:00

Yeah, David Warner just removed from everything and just filmed separately from everything else that's happened.

Cody: 01:35:07

He doesn't even like, really interact with anyone.

Jamie: 01:35:09

Oh, they film Warner like he is a late stage Donald Pleasance performance.

Mike: 01:35:16

Pleasance was on the short list.

Cody: 01:35:18

Was he?

Mike: 01:35:19

Yeah, him and like Christopher Lee and.

Cody: 01:35:21

Oh, man, we got pretty lucky with the cast we had. But just you always have to imagine what it'd be like to have another Christopher Lee performance.

Jamie: 01:35:29

Yeah, Warner fits the tone so much better than exactly.

Mike: 01:35:33

Yeah, he has like that. He has like that. Oh, like perfect. Knows how to play smirking aloofness that the movie has.

Jamie: 01:35:44

Well, he's both taking the role seriously, but also clearly is aware that he is in a very silly movie and adjust his performance accordingly. So it's very perfect. He's both a straight man and winking at the camera at the same time.

Cody: 01:35:59

And he doesn't even have a lot to do in the movie, but he, you know, he's him. So you get a great impression anyways. You get a lot of mileage out of a little bit of David Warner.

Mike: 01:36:11

I don't think we appreciate that the dude from Gremlin sword fights the Marquis de Sade.

Cody: 01:36:19

What? Why are we doing a gladiator thing here?

Mike: 01:36:24

David Moore said wimp. Why'd he say school time's over? He doesn't know he's school aged.

Jamie: 01:36:31

You're clearly a grown man.

Cody: 01:36:33

None of this makes a lot of sense.

Jamie: 01:36:35

Well, he's at the end. Like, this is the final lesson of the Marquis school of pain.

Cody: 01:36:45

I've been axed.

Mike: 01:36:47

You were into it.

Cody: 01:36:50

Is this play or back play?

Mike: 01:36:56

At least he died coming.

Jamie: 01:37:00

Oh, he's like the dude from Necromanic.

Cody: 01:37:02

Oh, no. Two little splurts.

Mike: 01:37:04

And then suddenly, David Warner just has.

Cody: 01:37:06

A fucking machine gun that he had stowed up there. He just pulled it out from the rafters.

Jamie: 01:37:10

Well, now he seems to have a miniaturized harpoon gun that shoots bullets. I have no idea what's going on with this prop.

Cody: 01:37:20

Okay, wait, wait. I forgot about this detail too. He didn't even realize this was his arch enemy's great grandson. Oh, a loft more. What a coincidence. He was just.

Mike: 01:37:30

He just happened to come Back to this town. And then there's David water firing, which.

Cody: 01:37:34

Is such a weird thing to me that the villain doesn't actually know that he has a connection to the hero of the story. God, this is great, too. It's just slowly twisting and firing.

Jamie: 01:37:44

I love any villain that has no idea he's in a movie until he's dying.

Cody: 01:37:49

And the perfect turn so they can swap out the stuntman to dump him into the wax bolt that. It's fun.

Jamie: 01:37:56

That's totally wax. And not just a bowl, like a giant vat of oatmeal.

Cody: 01:38:02

Would you like a closer look? It's my catchphrase. Back to the wax.

Mike: 01:38:07

Just looked like he had papier mache on his face. No, not the werewolf.

Jamie: 01:38:15

There's something so cruel about ripping the head off of a dude in a wheelchair who's in a fire at the top of a staircase.

Cody: 01:38:23

Oh, my goodness.

Jamie: 01:38:24

It's like Rain Wilson stabbing that dude who's on fire. And super honestly.

Mike: 01:38:32

The last exclamation point on that needed to be. He's then pushed down the stairs.

Jamie: 01:38:38

Director's cut.

Cody: 01:38:39

I'm a little confused because didn't he kill the werewolf with the silver sword before, or.

Jamie: 01:38:43

No, he killed Briggs.

Mike: 01:38:45

Yes, he killed Briggs werewolf, who is mid werewolf. So actually, if you're eternally mid werewolf, could anything kill you, or does it still have to be silver?

Cody: 01:38:58

I enjoyed the. The touch there of the detective trying to get out of the mummy's tomb as he's now being burnt alive.

Jamie: 01:39:06

You guys missed all the action in this movie.

Mike: 01:39:09

Which means she's still alive in there.

Cody: 01:39:11

Most of these, right? Like, a zombie can be destroyed by fire. I'm assuming a mummy can be destroyed by fire. The werewolf can't.

That guy's just gonna walk out of there and commit more evil.

Mike: 01:39:20

Well, technically, they're all still made out of wax, aren't they? I don't know, because, I mean, when the. When the Marquis died, he kind of just became a wax statue again.

Cody: 01:39:29

I think that's just very good wax acting.

Mike: 01:39:31

That's true. That's very true.

Jamie: 01:39:35

The mummy died by fire, Dracula by water. How do we use that?

Cody: 01:39:42

Like all good wax movies, though, the wax work has to end in fire.

Mike: 01:39:46

Always.

Jamie: 01:39:47

It's like, still final burn than wax masks. So. So we're going up.

Cody: 01:39:52

Yeah.

Mike: 01:39:55

That goddamn hand.

Cody: 01:39:56

The hand's still alive. The werewolf's still alive. What are we doing here? There's so much evil in the world.

Mike: 01:40:01

So many things can happen. There could be mysterious recastings. We don't know.

Cody: 01:40:06

They could get stuck in time.

Mike: 01:40:10

God and the devil can exist in this.

Cody: 01:40:17

Speaking of.

Mike: 01:40:17

Seriously, if you've never seen Waxwork too, watch it. It's fucking delightful.

Cody: 01:40:20

It's a trip. Has anyone else here seen Night Train to Terror?

Jamie: 01:40:27

No, I haven't trained to. I can't remember.

Mike: 01:40:31

Sounds familiar to me.

Cody: 01:40:32

I watched it recently, and the premise is Satan and God are sitting in a train car. And it's an anthology movie, so they just kind of pop into various people's lives and watch them, and they're.

They're betting on if the person's going to go to heaven or hell. It's a silly movie, but that's actually.

Mike: 01:40:48

Kind of an incredible premise.

Cody: 01:40:50

It's a fun premise. Yeah. As long as you're talking about, you know, the devil and God existing in a kind of B movie horror film.

Mike: 01:40:56

That'S the only place they do exist.

Cody: 01:40:58

Yep. They need to sit in a train car and have bets on how many souls they get for that session.

Mike: 01:41:03

Work for Constantine.

Jamie: 01:41:04

Pretty consistent God and Devil behavior by most mythologies.

Cody: 01:41:08

Yeah, true.

Mike: 01:41:11

Bob Keane.

Cody: 01:41:14

And Cry if you want to. What a great kind of stinger to go on the credits after seeing, you know, the whole building burned down and all the. The butlers dying.

Mike: 01:41:23

All the butlers. It's very American Werewolf in London, which I.

Cody: 01:41:26

It's a wonderful song choice. I honestly love this.

Mike: 01:41:34

H. How can I. I. I feel so jealous of the people who got to see this in a theater, not knowing what it was, who got to.

Jamie: 01:41:43

See that opening and not knowing what it was on fire.

Cody: 01:41:47

I didn't take the time to watch the trailer for this. I wonder how the trailer sold the movie. If it was leaning into the fact that it's a horror comedy or if they really played up the horror aspect.

Jamie: 01:41:55

Wax Work Man.

Mike: 01:42:01

Cortison. I just love how that was in there.

Jamie: 01:42:06

Werewolf Killer's Assistant is the premise of a movie if I've ever heard one.

Cody: 01:42:10

Marquee Decide Girls.

Jamie: 01:42:16

Crash, Flash, Lash and Dash. I love these awesome superhero grips.

Mike: 01:42:23

Oh, no.

Cody: 01:42:24

Bad dudes. All right, I'm watching the trailer now, and it's got a killer voiceover. Imagine a world of terror than the supernatural.

Mike: 01:42:37

They're.

Cody: 01:42:37

They're kind of playing up the horror aspect more than the comedy aspect.

Mike: 01:42:41

That's a mistake.

Cody: 01:42:44

It's. It's getting a little goofier as it goes. They don't have over the rope. Yeah. All right. They're.

They're not exactly hiding the comic parts of the movie, but they. They definitely are playing it up as a more horror film.

Mike: 01:43:09

This was a we don't actually know how to advertise this film kind of trailer.

Cody: 01:43:14

It's being pretty straight up about the premise of the film though. You know, it showed multiple characters crossing into new realms. It's giving a lot away.

Jamie: 01:43:22

Look, we are gonna put all of our advertising know how into creating the perfect poster.

Cody: 01:43:30

It's.

Mike: 01:43:31

It's the greatest. But I need to. I. I would love to own that poster. I need to buy that.

Jamie: 01:43:34

Dedicated to Hammer, Argento, Romero, Dante Landis, Spielberg, Wells, Carpenter, and mom and dad.

Cody: 01:43:41

No, I feel like the poster for this movie would make a really good cardboard standout at a VHS shop. Oh yeah.

Mike: 01:43:50

I wonder if we can get that specially made.

Cody: 01:43:52

Oh, I bet you could. I mean, probably breaking some sort of.

Jamie: 01:43:54

Copyright violation for our own homes. Perpetually welcome, welcoming us to the waxworks.

Cody: 01:44:01

Our own personal wax.

Mike: 01:44:03

As far as the eye can see.

Cody: 01:44:06

Anyways, folks, that has been wax work. I kept saying like alternating between wax works and wax work, but it's hard.

Mike: 01:44:13

Not to say wax works.

Cody: 01:44:14

Yeah, it's wax work with a no s. That seems very wrong to me. I.

Mike: 01:44:19

Well, there's only one wax work in the film. It's not like they visit multiple wax works.

Cody: 01:44:23

Yeah, I've always kind of thought like the wax works would be the exhibits inside of a wax work. They're the works of wax.

Jamie: 01:44:31

It's wax work, but it's honest.

Mike: 01:44:35

Let me see something.

Cody: 01:44:37

Oh no, we're going to the research phase of the podcast.

Mike: 01:44:40

Okay, Wax work definition is. Oh, this is interesting. Okay, so a wax work is specifically the. The mod. The. The dummy. The actual wax dummy.

Cody: 01:44:55

Okay, so a wax work is a work of wax.

Mike: 01:44:58

Singular, British. It is an exhibition of wax mummies.

Cody: 01:45:02

Okay, so can blame this on Hickox being British.

Mike: 01:45:06

Yes, that would be. That would be. What's going on there.

Cody: 01:45:09

You learn something every day.

Mike: 01:45:10

Well, at least our commentary was informative in some way.

Cody: 01:45:13

Yeah, we just had to force these people to stick around for like an hour 45 before they got to anything interesting.

Mike: 01:45:18

You know, sometimes these can just be fun and it can just be for us. I've been looking forward to this all week. I fucking love waxwork.

Cody: 01:45:24

Well, now I feel like the jerk.

Mike: 01:45:25

I don't know why I got mad at the audience.

Cody: 01:45:28

Oh, I thought you were mad at me. Yeah, you can yell at them all you want. They don't exist.

Mike: 01:45:30

No, of course not. I only. Only have hatred for the audience.

Cody: 01:45:35

You sons of bitches. If you bastards want any more of this content, you can find more slop over@boxofficepulp.com or wherever you get your podcasts.

We have a whole bunch of other commentaries if you randomly popped into this one. We've been on a slow kick of wax movies for the last few months, so go check those out. Keep the waxing up.

Mike: 01:45:56

Actually, since I'm baking these, since I'm baking the season of wax, these actually might come out in succession instead of several months apart. Maybe. I don't know. We could still screw it up.

Cody: 01:46:09

These are never coming out. No one. If you were listening to this, it somehow means we're dead and we just released the archives.

Mike: 01:46:14

No, I'm having all of copies of Box Office Pulp buried in my tomb.

Cody: 01:46:19

I like the idea of putting a podcast onto a physical medium so you can be buried with them.

Mike: 01:46:23

Just old reels, this old reel to reels, then buried microfiche tape for some reason. And Jamie, what is the special thing about my tomb?

Jamie: 01:46:32

It can only be opened from the inside.

Mike: 01:46:36

See, I like to test my friends to make sure they follow through with my wishes upon my death.

Cody: 01:46:40

See, I assume, Mike, you're one of those guys who would want a tomb that had a telephone line going into a mansion next door?

Jamie: 01:46:48

You can bother the rich.

Cody: 01:46:49

Yes. From beyond the grave, please. Actually, Mike, do that.

Could you get, like, your coffin and have the inside, like, all torn up like you were trying to scratch your way out in case, like, archaeologists ever find you? They're just gonna be terrified, like, he was buried alive.

Mike: 01:47:03

I just write death is only the beginning on the inside of my coffin. Throw people off.

Cody: 01:47:07

I think these are all wonderful ideas, folks at home. If you have wonderful ideas for how you should be buried or how we should be buried, you can go ahead and send those to us.

We technically have a Twitter account, but I don't want to go there anymore.

Mike: 01:47:19

We're gonna move over to Blue Sky. I need to set that up.

Cody: 01:47:22

Just mess this up.

Mike: 01:47:23

Even Facebook is questionable. But, you know, whatever. You can message us somewhere. You know, box Office P. Yeah, we.

Cody: 01:47:31

Hope you had a good time. Go listen to more pop. I. I got confused with my words. I'm gonna say more wax Office Pulp and that.

Jamie: 01:47:39

Wax Office Pulp. I like that.

Mike: 01:47:42

Why didn't we name the season of wax? That. That's awesome.

Cody: 01:47:46

Yeah, we. We up.

Jamie: 01:47:49

Name every episode.

Cody: 01:47:50

Yeah. This is called A Midwest Goodbye, where it takes forever and you just want to go home, but you can't because we keep talking.

Anyways, how was your evening, folks? Did you have a good time? Did you have fun? Yeah. Okay. Get the hell out of here. That's a wrap.

Mike: 01:48:02

You think anybody listening to this had a sexual awakening during the whipping scene?

Cody: 01:48:06

Statistically, yes.

Mike: 01:48:07

Cool. You get more out of life when.

Cody: 01:48:11

You go out to a movie. When we were making the Adamantium jokes, I wanted to make one about Uncle Ben being drowned in the adamantium, but it was too.

It was too inside baseball for the audience. I was gonna do my impression. Uncle Ben being drowned by Adamantium.

Mike: 01:48:34

Oh, God. Then it just. It's just the ending panel from the Death of Wolverine. But it's Uncle Ben. Just Tobey Maguire with his arms around Uncle Ben.

Statuess Uncle Ben.

Cody: 01:48:51

Ah, see, that's how I want to be buried. Solid block of Adamantium. Please remember to replace the speaker on.

Mike: 01:48:58

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